DARVO: What Does it Mean?

DARVO is an acronym that refers to manipulative behavior employed by psychological abusers. 

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DENY, ATTACK and REVERSE the roles of VICTIM and OFFENDER.

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Fear of exposure facilitates DARVO by triggering the 'fight or flight' response toward a real or perceived threat of exposure.

 

DENY - (flight) The Perpetrator is unable or unwilling to face and process the heinous nature of their abusive behavior. 

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ATTACK - (fight) Because a defensive posture implies weakness or an admission of guilt, the perpetrator seizes control by taking an offensive stand in fierce opposition to the threat (exposure), thereby REVERSING the roles of VICTIM and OFFENDER.

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"It's not me, it's you!

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This is not the behavior of normal 'sinners' attempting to shift the blame, flip the script, or like Adam in the Garden of Eden, point the finger at God, saying, "the woman you gave to be with me, SHE..."

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DARVO is more insidious. It is the work of narcissists, psychopaths, and devoted manipulators skilled in their craft to hide from themselves and others the knowledge of their addictions, evil deeds, and intentions.

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"I am the predator, you are the prey. If you ever leave me, I will destroy you."

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There are two additional terms that identify psychological behaviors similar to

DARVO:

PROJECTION and GASLIGHTING.

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In the extreme, PROJECTION manifests when the perpetrator lays slanderous accusations of their own secret misdeeds onto the person in their circle that poses the greatest threat to exposing those secrets. The purpose is to shift the focus away from themselves and seize control of the narrative to avoid the devastating consequences of 'public exposure'.

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DARVO and PROJECTION can occur intentionally or unconsciously. GASLIGHTING, however, is distinctly driven by malice aforethought to inflict harm and manipulate the victim toward a specific outcome. Through lies and misrepresentation of facts surrounding conversations and events, the victim's perception of reality is severely called into question. When the victim starts asking, "Am I losing my mind?" the perpetrator is close to accomplishing their objective. The mental instability and confusion created is used to justify their grand scheme to discredit, divorce, institutionalize, abscond with children or assets, and more. 

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DARVO, PROJECTION and GASLIGHTING are driven by a common emotion. FEAR. 

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"Everyone who does evil hates the Light,

and will not come into the light for

fear that their deeds will be exposed."

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"Do you know what they do to people like me in prison?"

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